Being in love has a negative connotation these days. The millennial way of thinking dictates that hook-up culture is the best way to be romantically linked with someone else. The idea of dating—being in a serious, exclusive relationship— is not widely shared anymore. In other words, this is the generation that would rather sleepover at a strangers house and creep out the door at 7am the next morning than wake up to the same person day after day.
This isn’t definitely isn’t surprising; as a member of this generation myself, I understand that the pressures of daily life don’t make a relationship look enticing. I’m a college girl juggling internships, college classes, a social life, and somehow maintaining my personal well-being, as well as preparing for the real world. I’m just as stressed as the next person and it’s easy to sympathize with the idea that a relationship just wouldn’t fit into an already-hectic life. The no-strings-attached habit is an appealing one, and if that is what you choose, I completely understand.
That is how I would be living if my relationship hadn’t miraculously manifested one day. My boyfriend, Tyler, walked into my life one day about a year and a half ago, and things haven’t really been the same since.
I’m in my twenties. I’m in the years of personal growth and discovery. As previously discussed, having a relationship in this stage of the game isn’t easy, but I’ve found that being in love at 20 is one of the best things that has ever happened to me. Maybe a relationship at this age isn’t for you, but here are some of the reasons why I believe you should be in love in your twenties.
There’s stability in the instability
When you’re with the right person, no matter how inconsistent the rest of your life can be, your partner provides a sense of relief. I can always rely on my boyfriend to be there when I need a shoulder or a voice of a reason. At times, he’s proven to be more beneficial than my close friends. Your twenties are full of serious, terrifying changes, but a steady relationship will aid you through the rough waters.
Mundane activities become adventures
Whether it’s running errands on Friday nights or sitting on the couch in front of the TV, a partner can turn the ordinary, boring event into a memory you won’t ever forget. Some of my favorite memories with my boyfriend are ones that should be considered the most boring. You always have somebody to do nothing with. Your twenties are a prime time for adventures and lifelong memories, but a relationship can make everyday one to remember.
If you are loved the right way, you will learn to love yourself the right way
When Tyler and I started dating, I slowly came to appreciate little pieces of myself again, because he appreciated them. Fast forward a year and I have never been happier with who I am as a person. Your twenties are a time of self-doubt and of course you can always find ways to love yourself, but sometimes you need a valuable voice to remind you of the things you’ve forgotten about yourself.
You will change
Relationships have the powerful potential to change you. The changes I’ve seen in myself since dating Tyler are innumerable and invaluable. Some changes are better than others, but everyone that comes in and out of your life has a lasting impact on you. Your relationship is bound to leave a mark on you and in the midst of your twenties, change is always good.
Compromise becomes easy
Life is all about learning to compromise. Whether it’s in a professional setting or in a friendship, setting aside what you want for the sake of the other party is difficult to master. A relationship, especially in the selfish era of your twenties, teaches you how to compromise. It could be as minimal as not going to the restaurant of your choice or as serious as giving up your dream apartment, because your partner doesn’t like that part of town. It seems hard, but when you’re in love, compromise comes more easily.
You can still be your own person
A healthy relationship is when the two people can exist outside of the relationship. Having your own life and your own friends is essential in your twenties. From going out with the girls to sitting down with a good book in Starbucks, doing things on your own gives you a sense of satisfaction. Taking time for yourself also makes you value the time you spend with your partner. When you’re in love, you feel good about being alone because you’re never lonely.
Intimacy takes on a whole new meaning
There’s something about the no-strings-attached nights and the appeal of never having to face that person again. However, there’s also something to be said about another person learning and knowing what you like. When you are in a relationship, you gradually become more comfortable, and you lose any previous inhibitions you might have had. The longer a relationship goes on, the stronger the connection and the better the intimacy.
There will always be somebody there to make you laugh
Laughter truly is the best medicine. Whether it’s inside jokes, shared smirks across a table, or full-bellied laughter at the expense of the other person, being in love is always funny. Your twenties should be filled with laughter, and being in love with someone who makes you laugh guarantees happy days.
You can be yourself without feeling judged
Everyone knows what being judged feels like. It’s an uncomfortable feeling; it makes you want to check yourself. In a relationship, you can always be who you truly are. Whether it’s singing Taylor Swift at my boyfriend from the passenger seat or covering my eyes during scary movie previews, I never feel like I have to be someone else. Being in love makes it okay to be yourself without the feeling of being judged.
Being in love is an indescribable experience
It’s hard to describe what being in love is like. You could learn all of the languages in the world and still probably have a difficult time defining it. I wish I could better explain it and hopefully, somebody will be able to put it into words. Being in love has been one of the most enriching and fulfilling experiences of my life and I wouldn’t want to spend my twenties any other way.
We don’t necessarily have control of when love comes into our lives, but I truly believe that we should embrace it, even when we’re young.
If you are currently in love, tell us in the comments how you met your significant other!