“You just need to create your own opportunities.”
Wherever I look, wherever I turn I see this quote. You just need to create your own opportunities. Simple as that, just get out there and do your thing. But what most people fail to mention is that it isn’t that easy. It isn’t easy to overcome your fears. It isn’t easy to overcome self-doubt. It isn’t easy to get out of your comfort zone. But here’s the thing: it is worth every little effort! Because out of the comfort zone is where the magic will happen.
This right here is a good example: I wouldn’t even be writing to you if I wouldn’t have found the courage to step out of my comfort zone and send Coley a message. I was planning to write a real “how to” post filled with actionable steps to help you get into action, but then I realized that that’s not what it is about. It is not about the action steps. They are different for any of us. No, it is about overcoming fear and self-doubt and finding the courage within you to create your own opportunities. And there is only one thing I can think of to help: a little bit of a pep talk.
So here’s what we will do to get you to create your own opportunities: we will kick the most common fears in the butt and by the end of the post, you will feel so powerful and you will have found the courage within you to create your own opportunities, because…
You are amazing!
You are amazing! You are amazing! You are amazing! Don’t ever let anyone else tell you something different. You are perfect the way you are. Perfect with all your imperfections. Perfect with all your flaws.
You are enough!
And you are enough. You deserve the best of the best. We all deserve the best of the best. And you can get out there and get it. You have the power, the courage and the strength within in you. It is right there for you. Tap into your own greatness. The universe has your back. I have your back. You are amazing. You are enough. You are capable of reaching for the stars, and to grab them!
Know yourself and know your vision!
Here are the big life questions: Who are you? Where are you headed in life?
It is time to get to know yourself, to sit down and have a deep chat with yourself. You won’t feel happy and confident if you have no idea what makes you happy, what makes you feel uncomfortable. And you won’t be able to create your own opportunities because you don’t know what opportunity you are even creating. So I am asking you to get to know yourself. Start now.
My favorite method for doing this is to journal. To me journaling and writing are the best ways to connect with myself. You will get to know yourself with it more and more. Each time you sit down and write you will start chatting with yourself. And why should we only ever sit down with our best friend to chat, why not sit down with the person closest to you? Yourself. Knowing yourself will lead you to know about your vision, your plan, and your goals which will in the end give you the confidence to step up and to…
No one can tell you what to do!
…stop listening to other people’s opinions. Just as Steve Jobs says in my all time favorite quote:
“Your time is limited so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the result of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become.”
This your life. No one can tell you what to do in it, just as you can’t tell anyone else what to do. This is your arena, your place to shine. So by all means, please go out there and do your thing, even if anyone else might say your crazy. And the thing is, so often we think that everyone else might judge us, but here’s the truth: most people are not thinking about you. They are too busy thinking about their own life – we all are. So while you think that they are thinking about you, they are busy thinking that you are thinking about them. See how crazy that is?
Forget about perfectionism!
Now we already talked about the most common fears: thinking that you are not good enough and believing that others might judge you, so it is time to address another thing that is most often holding us back: Perfectionism. We always want to make it “perfect.” The CV, the motivation letter, our headshot. Or also a favorite: “first I have to be a perfect writer, than I can apply to become a contributor.” I am not saying that you shouldn’t invest time and energy in your CV or your headshot, but there is a fine line between being motivated to do your best and being kept from actually getting out there to create your opportunity.
Know when it is enough and when this need to be perfect is actually keeping you from your work. And in case you forgot: there is no perfect. You will never be perfect in everyone’s eyes. Some might like what you have to say and some might not. That’s a battle we all face and is a fantastic battle, because it isn’t a battle at all; it’s life. And we are all in this together, doing our best to improve. Kick perfectionism in the butt and start to focus on growth and learning instead.
A no is never a bad option!
Most times the worst result from you trying to get that opportunity is a hearing a “no.” But why is a no such a bad thing? It isn’t. I can tell you from experience, after failing one of my finals at my university (something I never ever thought would happen to me), it sucks. But it is not the end of the world (I can only say this so lightly now after months of hard work overcoming my self-doubt and I am still working on it now). You will get over it and arise even stronger.
Because that’s what those pullbacks do: they give you the opportunity to learn and to grow. Just like the phoenix in Harry Potter, you will arise, but this time even stronger.
Now that we had a little bit of a pep talk, it is time for you to get out and create your own opportunities. Maybe even print this and stick it above your desk in case once again you are thinking that you are not good enough (which we all do from time to time). Let it be your reminder. You are amazing! You are good enough! You can and you will do this!
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